Ramblings on a Friday

I started this newsletter with so much vigor that I dreamed about it a few times after I launched( “launched” is such a fancy word, you’d think I started a bad-ass company 🤧). I was determined to carry it on my head like groundnut and be going up and down to sell my market. But the sun is too much and my head is paining me. So forgive my lessened energy and subscribe please😏.

Or did I offend you people? I want to know now so that I’ll share chilled minerals and we’ll let bygones be bygones. Before it gets too heated and bottles start breaking, tell me now. If I haven’t offended you, just tell me something. I want to learn from you. You can let me know what I can do better. You can tell me what you think of my posts, even if it’s harsh. I’ll accept it 🥲

I know many of us are angry and rightfully so. Sometimes a girl does not even realise plenty anger is built inside her until somebody eats the last plantain in her plate and the person receives hot slap. I’m not saying I’m the girl or anything, I’m only giving an instance please. I will not fight anybody because of food unless it is plantain 😏. Life in Nigeria is not for the weak and sapa-bound. That’s why I am going to run away because I am not going to pretend that I am strong abeg. Nobody is sharing money for who fit withstand this country’s wahala pass. Everybody’s head dey hot now. People are not smiling.

Maybe this photo of a fine girl smiling will make you smile. I mean, it should. This is a fine girl. A very fine girl 😒

As for me I can’t smile. I went to look for money yesterday. Long story short, somebody dash me 500 naira 😭 The soft life is not softing. Your girl has gotten darker and rashes have decorated her face. Stress, nice one. You do well. This is where I miss home, at least there’s free food.

They should remind our president that February 10th has reached.

Now, I’m just looking for who will include me in their Valentine’s Day plans 😌. The person that is supposed to be my val said my forehead is too big and girls with big foreheads have issues. Long story short, he said I should not stress him and he has blocked me. The shege continues…